I think I am in Shock.

So last night while on Facebook Joe's mother started talking through chat. She told me she's planning on getting re-married in December. The only thing that is the same month her divorce from Joe's dad is going to be final. So when she said that I couldn't believe what she was saying. I guess if it makes her happy and that is a good thing, but jeez the ink will be barely dry by the time she's getting re-married. So yeah, I just had get that out there, because it's pretty crazy. Oh well.

';..;'

So I recently found out an old high school friend is expecting a baby boy. Which is super cool because she'll be a great mom. The only thing that puts a thorn in my side about it is that she has the exact due date I would have had with my little Mac. Which kind of makes me a little rough. So I know know 2 people that have due dates in the same area as mine and it makes me sad. I miss you little Mac. And we love you.

Fire!!!

The front of the building.

This is our front door.

This is our hall way from our door.

This is the front of the building where the fire started.

This is the the inside of our apartment. In the corners you can see the start of the burning. Kind of scary because it wouldn't be that long till it would have been a problem!

So in the early morning of June 7, 2010 there was a lot of banging on doors. It was getting annoying because of how late it was, but I didn't want to open the door because out of fear of what kind of people were out in my hall way!!! So we just sat there watching tv. Eventually the knocking was on our door so we open the door and it was a police officer tell us that there was a fire. We quickly turned off the tv, I grabbed some flip flops and my phone and Joe ran out in bare foot. As soon as we got into the hall way we could already see the flames coming already entering the hall way! I don't know what time all this was exactly going down, my first memory was them already working on the flames was 2:19am and it seemed like we had already been out there for at least 20 or more minutes but when your in that kind of situation time doesn't really go the way it really does.

So there is nothing like watching flames keep getting closer to your apartment with your neighbors who have the same kind of worries that you do. All I kept feeling ok with was the fact that we had insurance on everything but was worried about the idea of actually having to replace it. It was just crazy watching them put out the flames! If I never have another fire in my life it'll be awesome! I am glad for neighbors who are really friendly when they are in need (it was nice to just get to know them a little bit). Also glad for the fire department being about 2 blocks if that away. Also am glad that no one was hurt and everyone made it out safe.

We weren't allowed back into our apartment until about 3:30 and then they still came in after that to check the CO2 levels. We weren't able to get to bed till 4am. Joe's work being nice enough gave him the night off to help me get the smoke smell out of the apartment. It was a long day today and hope it never ever happens again!

I really miss Wisconsin.

So I guess I'm not sure what I'm doing now

So I've been in counciling for the past couple months, but today I ended it because I feel like my issues are resolved, but when I go we just are there talking about just random stuff and the councilor seems to fill in the time with her personal stories. I've been feeling since the last couple sessions why am I still here because I was really feeling better and I didn't even know what to say anymore. So now that I said that I'm thinking that I didn't know if that is what I should have done or not. She told me I had another 6 free sessions to do so maybe I feel like I should use them because they are there. She did say I could use them for a couples thing and bring Joe, but if we don't really need it should I even bring it up to Joe? So now I'm kind of confused at what to do. I guess I'll just have to think about it to see what I feel I need. I do feel a lot better though. I can be around little kids without feeling really nervous. I can walk into the baby section or even past without just feeling pain and sadness. So I guess I don't really need it, but if your getting something for free should you just use it till it's all gone?

I feel like I should write.

So nothing really has been going on at all. Joe's been working 12 hour shifts and it hasn't been all that great at all. I hate going to be alone 5 nights a week. It makes me really sad. Then I stay up way to late because I just want to lie down and fall asleep, which works but I'm not liking the fact that I'm going to be at 2am and getting woken up for a little bit at 6 whatever when Joe's crawling into bed. So it's just cruddy because I'm not sleeping well at all. I just hope it's short lived with the nights so I can start sleeping good again with a hubby that is sleeping at the same time. Also, it really sucks that I should be cleaning during the day, but I don't want to do to much because I'm afraid of waking up Joe. Jeez!

I think it's time to move!

So we are really getting close to the top of the housing list. We have been waiting for our lease to be over and now that it is we are getting annoyed. We have been in this place for 6 months and I think I'd be good leaving. Some of the things that we had to have them come in and fix and starting to break again. The pain off the toilet seats on cracking and the caulk is starting to crack in the showers. Plus I would love to get a possible 3 bedroom place on base! That would be freaken awesome!!! Wish us luck.

What to do?

So lately I have been praying for something to try to figure out some stuff in life. So now I finally get my answer and now I don't know what to do with it. It's a good feeling to know your being listened to, but it's also worry some because now I wory that I won't be able to do whatever I need to do to follow through. So just wish me luck and when I really figure it all out you will know. :) Thanks and Love you guys!